Colonel Davis sits in his office. Lt Knox enters and salutes. She hands the Colonel a laptop with a heavily encrypted message from a posthumous Major Briggs…
Major Briggs- “Colonel, if you get this message then I’m afraid I have very grave news for you. There is a new threat to our national security, a threat like no other. My esteemed mentor, Dougie Milford taught me many things. Things that at first seemed inconceivable to me.
I came to learn of two locations that exist outside of our standardised space and time, the white lodge and the black lodge. You may think of these places as intel hubs, an idealistic Pentagon and a thoroughly corrupted Kremlin. These places or perhaps realms are engaged in a continuous game of cat and mouse. The dwellers of this ‘black lodge’ feed off something they refer to as ‘garmonbozia’-the pain and suffering of human beings. They have a hierarchy of sorts. Their commander in chief goes by the name of ‘Judy.’
This ‘Judy’ is rarely seen, constantly on the move. I tried in vain for many years to locate them but ultimately failed. I have seen Judy’s underlings. One goes by the name of ‘BOB’, an evil parasitic creature that murders the innocent and violates women.
As previously mentioned, there is a white lodge where I myself now reside. It is a place of serenity and tranquility. This lodge is operated by ‘The Fireman’, an incredibly tall, almost completely silent man. The white lodge has a vital asset by the name of Laura Palmer. This Laura possesses a ‘light’, a certain purity that Judy wishes to extinguish..for good.
Early on in my career, I began to work with a team within the FBI, the ‘Blue Rose’ team. It has been my pleasure to work with Director Cole and Agent Rosenfield for many years. Together, we worked to infiltrate these ‘lodges’ and make contact with their dwellers. Our first breakthrough came through the efforts of Agent Windom Earle. Sadly, the black lodge turned Windom so we had to try again. Agent Jeffries-a truly brilliant special agent-was the first agent to sucessfully undertake an undercover operation at ‘the Dutchmans.’
Jeffries was able to return, albeit briefly to share his intel from the meeting at the Dutchmans. Several higher ups from the black lodge were present, The Man From Another Place, BOB and The Tremonds who sometimes go by the name Chalfont. The old lady, Ms Tremond that is, and her grandson, Pierre are very high up the chain. They appear to be conduits of sorts, able to facilitate transportation to this strange convenience store like place. They have these gatekeepers, hobo looking types covered in scorched engine oil. Should you ever see one of them-and you may come across them-get yourself as far away from them as possible as quickly as possible. These men are highly dangerous.
Jeffries had to go into hiding so we prepared another agent, the highly tenacious and skilled special agent Dale Cooper. The black lodge had set about a plan to murder Laura Palmer and ensnare her. They would begin by corrupting her parents from a young age before they even met and before Laura was born. As much as we tried to stop them, they were successful in murdering Laura, they were also able to trap her in their lodge. It seems Laura has some kind of connection with our special agent as he reported seeing her in his dreams. We despatched Dale on a mission to Twin Peaks, ostensibly to solve the murder of Laura but it was in fact a covert intel collecting mission, It had to be carried out in secrecy and nobody could know of our connections.
The Log Lady, Deputy Hill and myself waited for the right time to brief Agent Cooper with the shocking revelations we had learned. I cannot explain how or why but there was a second Cooper, a ‘doppleganger’ if you will, waiting in the black lodge. It appears that this doppleganger was working in cohorts with Windom, BOB and a one armed man by the name of Philip Gerard aka ‘MIKE.’ When a strange young lady, a Ms Annie Blackburn arrived in Twin Peaks, Cooper became bessotted with her. Windom kidnapped this Annie and used her as bait to trap our Cooper in the lodge thus freeing his doppleganger.
It took us 25 years to return this ‘double’ to the lodge. We concentrated our efforts on getting our man out and when the double fashioned a ‘tulpa’ by the name of Dougie Jones, we intercepted and made the switch. Cooper returned in a catatonic state and his double was still outside the lodge, constantly conspiring to kill Cooper. We turned Gerard and leveraged his magic abilities to assist Cooper and keep him safe until he figured out how to wake up. It appears that Cooper’s double had been trying for years to make contact with Judy. We believe with good evidence that at the time of our Cooper’s return, Judy was residing in the Palmer household.
In the end we succeeded in despatching the double back to the lodge. Cooper was back but he immediately attempted to rescue Laura after seeing her snatched out of the lodge. He made contact with Jeffries and went back in time to prevent Laura’s death. He saved her but Judy’s forces deposited her to another dimension.
With our best intel, Cooper went after Laura and we haven’t seen him since. This may seem strange to you, Colonel, as I’m sure you know, Laura is missing and there was never any report of her murder. Time itself has been altered Colonel but that is not why I am contacting you.
We believe Cooper and Laura are in hiding. They are in grave danger and it is vital we spare no effort in locating our assets and getting them to a place of safety. My second concern is the current state of the world. There are very high concentrated levels of garmonbozia in the world and the black lodge is enacting a world takeover, a hostile one.
Colonel, I urge you to reach out to the blue rose team in Philadelphia and my son, Sheriff Briggs in Twin Peaks. They will be able to help you. Sir, please do not hesitate to act on this intel. Our world is in mortal danger, mayday…MAYDAY.